Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

"Give Back, Give Back" by Marvin Bell is a poignant and introspective poem that explores themes of marriage, identity, loss, and the complexities of familial relationships. Through a deeply personal and reflective narrative, Bell delves into the sacrifices and transformations experienced within the confines of a relationship and the lingering effects on one's sense of self and purpose.

The opening line, "If I married him for length, none was so little so long," immediately introduces a tone of regret and reflection, suggesting that the expectations and realities of the marriage have diverged significantly. The phrase plays on the dual meaning of "length," alluding both to the physical and temporal aspects of the relationship, and setting the stage for an exploration of its deep and lasting impact.

The speaker's struggle to articulate her experience, "How think to explain it?—", and the assertion that "Words I have known are now his," convey a sense of loss of voice and agency. The imagery of his weight resting under her pillow further emphasizes the pervasive and oppressive influence of the husband's presence, even in his absence.

The metaphor of the children as "of groceries, and not of love" starkly depicts the transactional and unemotional nature of their conception, suggesting a lack of genuine affection and connection within the family unit. The absence of crying or emotional expression among the children implies a stifling of vulnerability and a suppression of genuine human experience, as if the "middle years were trying to break me of my light warping," indicating a struggle against the diminishing of her spirit and individuality.

The reference to the "white sheet of his will" and the inheritance of "the objects of original pleasure" highlights the material and possessive aspects of the relationship, where the speaker's sacrifices and the relinquishment of her own pleasure have ultimately benefited the husband's desires and legacy.

The speaker's admission, "I am the lot of him, as is my wont," reflects a resigned acceptance of her identity being subsumed by her husband's, yet there remains a yearning "to wear the ring of him, hear it and recreate it," suggesting a complex interplay of desire, loyalty, and the need for recognition and validation within the marriage.

Bell's depiction of "those marriages go to which woman is bound to be used" is a powerful critique of the societal and personal dynamics that render women objects of utility rather than partners in a relationship. The closing image of "the breathing pause at the long entrance of the children" evokes a moment of anticipation and uncertainty, capturing the tension between hope for the future and the weight of the past.

"Give Back, Give Back" is a deeply moving and thought-provoking meditation on the sacrifices made in the name of love and the enduring quest for self-realization and autonomy. Marvin Bell masterfully weaves together personal narrative and universal themes, inviting readers to reflect on the nature of commitment, the costs of conformity, and the possibility of reclaiming one's voice and identity.

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