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LIVING WITH A WIFE, by             Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography

"Living with a Wife" by John Updike is a vivid and intricate poem that explores the complexities and intimate moments of marital life through a series of poignant and often surreal images. Updike uses vivid descriptions and metaphors to capture the essence of his experiences and emotions in living closely with his wife, portraying both the ordinary and the mystical aspects of their shared domestic life.

At the Piano

This section opens with a cozy domestic scene, his wife playing Mozart seriously and barefoot, a moment filled with art and the unspoken depths of daily life. The image of the wife in "purple pants and my ski sweater" adds a personal and informal touch, while the description of Mozart being fumbled with a grimace introduces a sense of struggle within beauty. Updike observes this scene, a quiet spectator to his wife's concentration, her engagement with the music offering a glimpse into her inner world that is both intimate and separate from his.

In the Tub

The transformation of a simple bath into a scene of enchanting beauty continues Updike's exploration of the magical in the mundane. His wife is likened to a natural landscape, a pond reflecting the sky with mossy roots, enhancing the organic and almost mythical quality of the domestic sphere. The act of shaving becomes a ritualistic enhancement of her beauty, with the water too hot for any human, hinting at the superhuman or enchanted nature of his domestic partner.

Under the Sunlamp

In this segment, the wife's appearance under the sunlamp is described in almost alien terms, her face a "shield of greased copper" and her presence "too bright to look at long." This portrayal emphasizes the transformative and sometimes inaccessible aspects of his wife's persona, which can oscillate between familiar intimacy and startling otherness.

During Menstruation

Here, Updike delves into the more challenging aspects of domestic life, using intense imagery to describe his wife's menstrual pain. The house becomes a scene of catastrophe, reflecting the physical and emotional turmoil of menstruation. The vividness of "red pain flickers on the walls" and "wet flame runs downstairs" conveys a visceral response to his wife's suffering, showing a shared distress that permeates their home.

All the While

The final part of the poem addresses the ongoing, day-to-day life of the couple, where Updike contemplates the deeper, perhaps unknowable aspects of his wife. He questions her presence in his life in an almost existential manner, "Who sent you? / What is your assignment?" These questions elevate everyday cohabitation to a matter of fate or destiny, suggesting a profound, if baffling, significance to their shared life.

Throughout the poem, John Updike uses rich, sometimes startling imagery to explore the nuances of marital cohabitation, blending the ordinary with the extraordinary. Each section provides a snapshot of different moments and moods, painting a full picture of life with his wife that is filled with wonder, complexity, and deep affection. The poem itself acts as a testament to the layered experiences of love, companionship, and the mysteries of living closely with another person.


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