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"Stillbirth" by Laure-Anne Bosselaar is a poignant and deeply moving poem that navigates the complex terrain of grief following the loss of an unborn child. The poem is structured as a pantoum, a form known for its repetitive lines and stanzas, which serves to echo the cyclical nature of mourning and the recurring pangs of memory and loss.

The poem begins with the speaker hearing someone call out the name "Laetitia" at a train station, a name that holds significant emotional weight for the speaker. This moment triggers a rush of memories and a desperate search for a face in the crowd—a face that belongs to the child she never got to meet. The repetition of "No, Laetitia, no" emphasizes the denial and disbelief that often accompany unexpected reminders of loss.

As the poem unfolds, the speaker reveals that "Laetitia-Marie" was the name she had chosen for her daughter, who would have been thirty-two years old. This revelation highlights the passage of time and the way the speaker imagines the life that her daughter might have lived, had she survived. The detail that the speaker sometimes goes months without remembering her lost child speaks to the nature of grief, which can recede into the background of daily life only to resurface with intense clarity upon certain triggers.

The advice given to the speaker, "I was told not to look. Not to get attached," reflects the often well-meaning but painful guidance offered to mothers who experience stillbirth, suggesting a societal discomfort with confronting such profound losses directly. The poem suggests that some forms of grief are carried quietly, occupying a small, sometimes overlooked space in one's heart and mind.

The closing lines of the poem circle back to the beginning, with the speaker reflecting on the train's closing doors and the sound of her daughter's name being called out on the platform. This return to the start underscores the enduring presence of the child in the mother's memory, despite the passage of time and the efforts to move forward.

"Stillbirth" captures the enduring impact of losing a child before birth and the ways in which such a loss is woven into the fabric of a parent's life. Through its hauntingly beautiful repetition and vivid imagery, Laure-Anne Bosselaar's poem offers a testament to the love that persists beyond death and the ways in which grief can shape and redefine one's experience of the world.


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