Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

Jack Gilbert’s poem "By Small and Small: Midnight to Four A.M." is a poignant and heart-wrenching reflection on regret, love, and the intimate moments of loss. The poem captures the profound emotional struggle of the speaker during the final hours of a loved one’s life, revealing the depth of their regret and the desire for a more compassionate and connected farewell.

The poem opens with a stark admission: "For eleven years I have regretted it, / regretted that I did not do what / I wanted to do as I sat there those / four hours watching her die." This confession immediately sets the tone of the poem, conveying a sense of enduring sorrow and self-reproach. The repetition of "regretted" emphasizes the weight of this feeling and the significance of the missed opportunity that haunts the speaker.

The central image of the poem is the speaker’s desire to "crawl in among the machinery / and hold her in my arms." This vivid and tender image contrasts sharply with the cold, clinical environment of the hospital, represented by the "machinery." The speaker’s longing to physically embrace the dying loved one underscores the deep emotional connection and the human need for physical touch and comfort in moments of suffering and transition.

The speaker reflects on the potential recognition from the dying loved one: "knowing / the elementary, leftover bit of her / mind would dimly recognize it was me / carrying her to where she was going." This thought reveals the speaker’s hope that, even in the final moments of life, there would be a flicker of acknowledgment and connection. The phrase "elementary, leftover bit of her mind" suggests that while the person’s cognitive functions may have been diminished, a fundamental awareness and bond could still be present.

The act of "carrying her to where she was going" symbolizes a final act of love and care, a way of guiding and accompanying the loved one on their journey from life to death. This desire to be physically present and supportive in such an intimate and ultimate way highlights the depth of the speaker’s love and the intensity of their regret for not having acted on this impulse.

Gilbert’s use of simple, direct language adds to the emotional impact of the poem. The straightforwardness of the speaker’s confession and the clarity of the imagery allow the raw emotion and profound regret to come through unfiltered, making the poem deeply moving and relatable.

"By Small and Small: Midnight to Four A.M." is a powerful meditation on the themes of regret and the enduring desire for connection in the face of loss. Through the speaker’s poignant reflection on a missed opportunity to provide comfort and love in a loved one’s final moments, Gilbert captures the universal human experience of grappling with the weight of unfulfilled desires and the lasting impact of such moments. The poem serves as a reminder of the importance of seizing opportunities for compassion and connection, especially in times of profound emotional significance.

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