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MUSIC SWIMS BACK TO ME, by             Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography

In "Music Swims Back to Me," Anne Sexton captures the fragmented and haunting experience of a person confined in a mental institution, exploring themes of memory, isolation, and the transcendent power of music. The poem’s speaker, seemingly disoriented and lost in both time and place, reaches out for a sense of direction and understanding, only to find solace and continuity in the music that "swims back" to them, bringing with it a flood of memories.

The poem opens with the speaker asking, "Wait Mister. Which way is home?" This plea immediately establishes a sense of dislocation and confusion. The speaker is searching for direction, both physically and metaphorically, but the environment offers no clear answers. The dark moving in the corner suggests an encroaching sense of fear or despair, a feeling intensified by the absence of "sign posts" in the room. The description of the four elderly women in diapers further enhances the sense of helplessness and the passage of time, as if the speaker is surrounded by reminders of the inevitability of decay and the loss of autonomy.

Music, however, emerges as a recurring motif, representing a connection to the past and a form of emotional escape. The speaker recalls the night they were admitted to the institution, with the music playing in the background—a detail that seems to hold more significance than the traumatic event itself. The music becomes a sensory anchor, something that "swims back" to the speaker, even as other memories fade into obscurity. This connection to music suggests that it serves as a bridge between the speaker's fragmented present and a more coherent past, a way to reclaim some sense of identity in an environment designed to strip it away.

The speaker's recollection of the "strangled cold of November" and the image of the stars "strapped in the sky" reinforce the poem's mood of entrapment and alienation. Even the natural elements—typically associated with freedom and vastness—are portrayed as confined and oppressive. The moon, described as "too bright," becomes an intrusive presence, "sticking" the speaker with a "singing in the head." This metaphorical "sticking" could be interpreted as the persistent intrusion of involuntary memories or the inescapable awareness of their circumstances, yet the "singing" also hints at the way music involuntarily penetrates the speaker's consciousness, providing a strange comfort even as it underscores their isolation.

The repetition of "la la la" in the poem underscores the role of music as a comforting, almost childlike refrain, something simple and repetitive that the speaker can cling to. It also conveys a sense of resignation, as if the speaker is trying to hold on to this one thread of familiarity in a world that has otherwise become incomprehensible.

The poem culminates in the speaker being locked in a chair at eight a.m., a daily routine that strips them of their freedom, both physically and mentally. The absence of "signs to tell the way" reinforces the sense of being lost, not just in the physical space of the institution, but within their own mind. The radio, which "beats to itself," represents the monotonous and impersonal environment that surrounds the speaker, yet it also holds the power to evoke the music that connects the speaker to their past self—a self that danced "a circle" and was "not afraid."

The closing line, "Mister?" echoes the poem's opening, bringing the reader back to the speaker’s plea for guidance. It’s a poignant reminder of the speaker's ongoing search for understanding and connection, a search that seems to go unanswered. In this sense, "Music Swims Back to Me" can be seen as a meditation on the fragility of memory and identity, particularly within the dehumanizing context of mental illness and institutionalization.

Sexton’s use of music as a metaphor for memory highlights the way certain sensory experiences can transcend the boundaries of time and space, providing continuity in a life that has otherwise been fractured. The poem speaks to the universal desire for connection and the human need to hold on to something familiar when everything else has been stripped away.


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