Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

Mark Strand's poem "My Son" is a haunting meditation on absence, loss, and unfulfilled longing. Strand, known for his ability to blend the ordinary with the surreal, creates a deeply personal and introspective piece that resonates with a universal sense of grief and estrangement. The poem explores the relationship between the speaker and an imagined son, simultaneously evoking the intimacy of parenthood and the desolation of an unattainable connection.

The opening lines set a somber tone with the speaker addressing "My son, my only son, the one I never had." The paradox of mourning someone who never existed immediately introduces a layer of existential yearning. The "only son" becomes a representation of something deeply desired yet impossible to attain—a life path or relationship that remains out of reach. The phrase "would be a man today" adds poignancy, situating the loss in the present moment and imbuing it with a sense of time passing and opportunities irretrievably lost.

Strand’s minimalist language, marked by short, fragmented lines, enhances the ethereal quality of the poem. The son is described as moving "in the wind, / fleshless, nameless," reinforcing his spectral, insubstantial presence. This imagery situates the son not as a tangible being but as a manifestation of the speaker's imagination, regret, or longing. The "nameless" quality emphasizes his ambiguity—he is both specific and universal, a cipher for any unfulfilled connection or unrealized potential.

The middle stanza shifts to a more intimate and tactile moment: the son leans his head "lighter than air / against my shoulder." This tender gesture is tinged with sadness, as the impossibility of the son's physical existence is underscored by his weightlessness. The line blurs the boundaries between reality and imagination, inviting the reader into the speaker's private world of longing. The juxtaposition of a universal gesture of closeness with the ephemeral nature of the son heightens the emotional complexity of the scene.

When the speaker directly addresses the son, asking, "Son, / where do you stay, / where do you hide?" the question underscores the speaker's yearning for connection and understanding. The son’s response, "You never noticed / though I called / and called," is accusatory yet enigmatic. The repetition of "called" suggests persistent, unanswered attempts at communication. This moment invites interpretations of the son's voice as a projection of the speaker's inner guilt or unacknowledged emotions, suggesting that the speaker has overlooked or repressed vital aspects of their own experience or relationships.

The poem crescendos into its most abstract and haunting lines, as the son speaks of "a place / beyond, / beyond love, / where nothing, / everything, / wants to be born." This imagery is both paradoxical and evocative, suggesting a liminal space outside the confines of human understanding—perhaps the realm of the subconscious, the afterlife, or pure potentiality. The repetition of "beyond" emphasizes the distance and alienation between the speaker and the son, while the juxtaposition of "nothing" and "everything" captures the son’s existence as simultaneously absent and omnipresent.

Strand’s use of free verse, with its irregular line breaks and spare diction, mirrors the fragmented and elusive nature of the son. The lack of rhyme or consistent rhythm further reinforces the poem’s theme of disconnection, as the form itself resists coherence and completion. The son’s dialogue, delivered in stark, unembellished language, stands out against the reflective tone of the speaker, grounding the poem’s ethereal themes in stark emotional truths.

"My Son" can be interpreted on multiple levels. On a personal level, it may reflect the speaker’s grief for a child they never had or a life they never lived. On a broader scale, it resonates as a meditation on existential absence—the unfulfilled desires and connections that haunt every human life. The "place beyond love" evokes a realm where conventional emotional ties dissolve, leaving only the raw, unformed impulses of creation and longing.

Ultimately, the poem is a masterful exploration of how absence can take on a presence of its own. The imagined son becomes a vehicle for the speaker's deepest fears, regrets, and yearnings, encapsulating the universal human struggle to reconcile what could have been with what is. Strand’s delicate balance of intimacy and abstraction invites readers to inhabit the liminal space between reality and imagination, where loss and longing converge.

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