Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

In "Wife", Robert Creeley explores the complex, often dualistic nature of love, relationships, and memory. The poem reflects on the tension between physical presence and mental idealization, suggesting that intimate relationships are often complicated by a split between reality and imagination. Creeley’s minimalist language and introspective tone convey a profound internal struggle as the speaker confronts the difficulty of reconciling two versions of a partner—one tangible, one idealized—and the inevitable conflict that arises from trying to hold onto both.

The poem opens with the line, “I know two women,” immediately introducing the duality that lies at the heart of the speaker’s experience. This line sets up the idea that within the speaker’s mind, there exist two versions of a woman, possibly representing the same person as both a real, physical entity and an imagined or idealized version. This duality speaks to the complexity of perception in intimate relationships, where the person one loves can simultaneously occupy the roles of real partner and mental construct. The phrase “I know” suggests a level of intimacy with both versions, as if the speaker is deeply familiar with each woman, yet they exist in separate realms.

The speaker describes the first woman as “tangible substance, / flesh and bone.” This language grounds her in physical reality, emphasizing her corporeal presence. “Flesh and bone” evokes the concreteness of the human body, underscoring her existence as a real person with whom the speaker interacts in the physical world. This version of the woman represents the partner as she truly is, with all the tangible qualities and imperfections that accompany physicality. The choice of words here suggests an acceptance, even an appreciation, of her material reality, yet this also sets up a contrast with the other version of the woman.

The second woman, however, exists only “in my mind,” a construct of the speaker’s imagination or memory. Creeley notes that “She keeps her strict / proportion there,” implying that this idealized woman is contained and regulated within the speaker’s thoughts. This phrasing suggests a certain rigidity or perfection in this mental version, as though she conforms precisely to an imagined ideal. Unlike the physical woman of “flesh and bone,” this woman exists in a controlled, unchanging form, representing perhaps an ideal that cannot be achieved in reality. The “strict proportion” highlights the contrast between the fluid, imperfect nature of real life and the fixed, idealized vision that exists in the speaker’s mind.

The poem’s central conflict emerges in the lines, “But how should I / propose to live / with two such creatures / in my bed—.” Here, the speaker confronts the impossibility of reconciling these two versions of the woman. The bed, a symbol of intimacy and unity, becomes a battleground for these conflicting realities. The question “how should I propose to live” captures the speaker’s dilemma; he cannot fully commit to either version without betraying the other. This line reflects a struggle to balance real-world affection with the allure of an idealized partner, an internal conflict that often plagues those who feel torn between love as it is and love as they wish it to be.

In the final lines, “or how shall he / who has a wife / yield two to one / and watch the other die,” Creeley brings the poem to a poignant resolution. The phrase “who has a wife” grounds the speaker’s conflict in a commitment to a real partner, a spouse with whom he shares a life. This line implies a sense of responsibility or duty to the real, physical partner, who exists beyond the speaker’s mind. However, the phrase “yield two to one” suggests a need to let go of the mental ideal, to choose the tangible relationship over the imagined one. This choice is painful, as it involves “watching the other die,” symbolizing the loss of the idealized version of the woman, the fantasy that cannot coexist with reality.

Creeley’s conclusion highlights the emotional cost of this decision, as letting go of the imagined partner feels akin to a kind of death. The idealized woman, who exists only in the speaker’s mind, must be sacrificed for the real relationship to thrive. This line captures the bittersweet reality of love, where fantasy must be relinquished for the sake of genuine connection. The poem suggests that true intimacy requires embracing imperfection, accepting the tangible “flesh and bone” of a partner over the flawless but ultimately hollow constructs of the mind.

In "Wife", Robert Creeley poignantly examines the tension between reality and idealization in relationships. Through the speaker’s internal struggle, Creeley reveals the inherent conflict in trying to sustain both a real connection and an imagined ideal. The poem ultimately suggests that love requires a difficult choice: to honor the tangible, imperfect reality of a partner over the unattainable fantasy that exists within. Creeley’s language is spare yet evocative, capturing the emotional complexity of this choice and the quiet resignation that accompanies it. In accepting the real partner and letting go of the idealized version, the speaker confronts the nature of love as something that is both beautiful and rooted in the often challenging reality of human relationships.

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