Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

Anne Sexton's "Eighteen Days Without You, December 3rd-18th" is a sprawling, fragmented, and deeply introspective journey through the speaker’s emotions as she navigates the void left by her absent lover. Each section of the poem reflects a different aspect of this absence, blending memories, dreams, and reflections on nature with a growing sense of loss and longing. The poem is a meditation on time, the passage of seasons, and the ways in which love and loss are intertwined with the cycles of life and the natural world.

The poem begins on December 3rd, with the speaker reflecting on the bleakness of the season, describing December as the "molegray / mouth of the year." This imagery sets a tone of dullness and decay, highlighting the emptiness the speaker feels without her lover. The encounter with nature—seeing woodchucks, a deer, and a dead rabbit—underscores the harsh realities of life and death, which the speaker views with a detached resignation. The description of crows pecking at the rabbit's "green entrails" is particularly vivid, emphasizing the cruelty and inevitability of death. The speaker contrasts her own stillness with the movement of the sun dogs in the sky and her lover, "dogging up the old globe going west," reflecting her sense of being left behind, alone in a place that once held meaning.

On December 4th, the speaker recalls a pivotal moment in her relationship with her lover—meeting at Harvard Square on the day John F. Kennedy was assassinated. This memory is laden with historical and personal significance, intertwining national tragedy with their own shared grief and the beginning of their bond. The line "the brains fell out of his dazzling head" starkly captures the violence and horror of that day, while the shared act of crying and writing poems that "couldn't write" highlights the emotional intensity that drew them together. This memory serves as a reminder of the deep connection they once shared, forged in a moment of collective mourning.

As the days progress, the speaker's reflections become more introspective and tinged with bitterness. On December 5th, she recalls the secrecy of their meetings and the moral ambiguity of their relationship, as they "commute to [his] studio" and "take love in all its seasons." The tone here is one of resignation, acknowledging the wrongness of their actions but also the inevitability of their connection. The following days bring a deepening sense of loss as the speaker observes the natural world around her—the wind, the birds, the leaking faucet—all of which reflect her inner turmoil. The "last leaf / in the year's book" symbolizes the end of a chapter, the closing of a year, and the hardening of the earth's breast mirrors the hardening of her own heart as she faces the reality of her lover's absence.

On December 6th, the speaker reflects on a light rain, "as tranquil as an apple," which contrasts with the turbulent emotions she has been experiencing. This moment of quiet introspection is disrupted by the memory of a past Groundhog Day, when they hoped for a sign of life that never came. The imagery of the "coldblooded thing" and the "priest with his mouthful of beets" adds a surreal, almost grotesque quality to the memory, reflecting the strangeness and unpredictability of life.

Pearl Harbor Day, December 7th, brings with it a reflection on scars, both personal and historical. The speaker describes an icestorm that turns each twig into "Jewels," a moment of beauty amidst the cold and desolation. Yet, the day also brings memories of violence and death, as the speaker imagines "silver flies in the wind, little stars," and "broken mirrors" scattering far, symbols of the shattered world she inhabits. The birds, "hardly alive," and the owls forcing mice into the open, serve as metaphors for the harshness of survival in a world where the ice will either "do the birds in" or "come unglued."

On December 8th, the speaker tries to escape the cold by sending herself a Florida postcard, a reminder of warmer days spent together in July. The memory of summer, with its "snakes snapped their venom" and "leftover sparklers," is bittersweet, a contrast to the bleakness of the present. The speaker recalls the richness of the natural world in summer, with "sumac" and "red heads on display," but even these memories are tinged with the knowledge that those days are gone.

The poem's tone darkens on December 9th, as the speaker reflects on her lover's time in the Air Force, dealing with the "human remains" of men killed in Vietnam. This section is particularly haunting, as it delves into the gruesome realities of war and the dehumanization of soldiers reduced to "rubber sacks" within "aluminum coffins." The speaker's reflection on the "multi-hearse / jets" and the "Starlifter" planes that bring the dead home captures the horror and futility of war, contrasting sharply with the peaceful, natural imagery of the previous days.

December 10th brings a reflection on the sounds of nature, with the speaker recalling the barking of a rebellious fox and the quiet world sealed in ice. The memory of cicadas in August, with their "high whine," brings a moment of nostalgia, but it is quickly overshadowed by the realization that she and her lover are "a pair of scissors / who come together to cut," a metaphor for the destructive nature of their relationship.

On December 11th, the speaker reflects on the physical and emotional intimacy they shared, describing their connection as "bare" and "stripped to the bone." The imagery of "swimming in tandem" in the river called "Mine" suggests a deep, almost possessive bond, but the repeated assertion that "No one's alone" carries a note of isolation, as if the speaker is trying to convince herself of their unity even as she feels increasingly separate.

The poem continues to explore the speaker's feelings of isolation and disconnection as she goes about her daily life. On December 12th, she describes her work at a State School for the retarded, where she interacts with children who are "locked up with hospital techniques." The image of the hydrocephalic doorman, a five-year-old with a head "like a twenty-five / cent balloon," and the "two-headed baby" in the antiseptic crib, underscores the theme of confinement and the cruelty of nature. The speaker's efforts to bring music and dance to these children offer a moment of respite, but it is clear that her work is both physically and emotionally draining.

As the days progress, the speaker continues to reflect on the past, recalling a weekend spent at the Provincetown Inn in June, a thunderstorm in July, and a barhopping hunt for good whiskey. These memories are tinged with a sense of nostalgia and loss, as the speaker longs for the connection and joy they once shared.

By December 18th, the poem reaches a crescendo of despair, with the speaker declaring it "The day of the lonely drunk." The imagery of "no weather reports, / no fox, no birds, no sweet chipmunks," reflects the speaker's complete disconnection from the world around her. The half moon, described as "acid, bitter, sad," mirrors the speaker's own emotional state, as she sings the "Blended Whiskey Blues," a lament for the love that has been lost and the emptiness that remains.

"Eighteen Days Without You, December 3rd-18th" is a deeply introspective and emotionally charged exploration of loss, memory, and the passage of time. Through a series of vivid and often surreal images, Sexton captures the speaker's struggle to come to terms with the absence of her lover and the bleakness of the world without him. The poem's fragmented structure reflects the disjointed nature of the speaker's thoughts and emotions, as she navigates the complex terrain of love, loss, and longing.

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