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IMP OF THE VERBOSE, by                 Poet's Biography

Charles Harper Webb’s "Imp of the Verbose" is a self-aware, darkly comedic examination of compulsive speech, social discomfort, and the inability to leave silence undisturbed. The poem presents a speaker who is pathologically incapable of small talk, instead unleashing an overwhelming flood of personal confessions, inappropriate digressions, and unsolicited revelations that unsettle his conversational partners. Through irony, self-deprecation, and an escalating sense of absurdity, Webb explores the ways in which language, rather than bridging gaps between people, can create alienation, discomfort, and even self-destruction.

The poem begins with a seemingly mundane elevator exchange: “Traffic’s awful,” says my colleague as we ride the elevator to our floor. This line sets the stage for what should be a brief, conventional interaction, but the speaker immediately derails it. Instead of simply agreeing or responding in kind, he launches into an over-the-top, grotesque monologue about his wife’s mother’s funeral, an extramarital affair, a Xanax overdose, and a ruined Persian rug. Each new detail—“my little sword-swallower,” “barfed all over our best Persian rug,” “Two thousand dollars, and I had to throw it out”—escalates the conversation into surreal territory, creating a jarring dissonance between what was expected and what actually transpires.

This pattern continues in subsequent interactions. In a Tae Kwon Do class, the speaker’s partner merely exclaims, “Christ, I’m beat!”—an innocuous statement meant to express exhaustion. But rather than commiserate with a simple “Yeah, me too,” the speaker spirals into a convoluted confession about his paranoia over AIDS, an Epstein-Barr misdiagnosis, antidepressants, hemorrhoids, impotence, and suicidal thoughts. The sheer absurdity of linking Tae Kwon Do fatigue to a cascade of psychiatric and sexual dysfunctions exposes the poem’s central irony: the speaker’s compulsive verbosity turns ordinary exchanges into deeply uncomfortable experiences.

The absurdity reaches its peak in a conversation about welfare, where the speaker recounts his past as a drug-addicted, crime-committing welfare recipient—only to suddenly reverse his stance with an exaggerated declaration that “all Welfare leeches should be shot, or banished at the very least.” The irony is explicit: “This from me, a lifetime liberal Democrat!” The speaker?s words are no longer simply excessive; they are contradictory, betraying an instability in thought and identity. His next statement—“Fuck the homeless”—further exposes the unsettling performativity of his speech. The phrase is immediately followed by a critique of the very logic he employs: “We all paid taxes to educate those bums. They should’ve learned!” The absurdity lies in the fact that this argument assumes education automatically prevents poverty, a simplistic and cruel stance that the speaker likely doesn’t even believe. At this point, it becomes unclear whether he speaks out of genuine conviction, compulsion, or simply to provoke.

The poem then shifts to a moment of self-reflection, where the speaker directly questions the cause of his verbosity. “Am I a silence-phobe?” he asks, suggesting that his greatest fear is not awkwardness but being ignored. He imagines his conversation partner suppressing a yawn and thinking, “Six billion people, and I’m stuck next to him.” This anxiety—that he is a burden, that his presence requires justification—suggests a deeper insecurity. Rather than risk rejection, he overcompensates by over-sharing, as if proving his worth through relentless speech.

His introspection continues: “Do I fear that my neighbor feels burdened by the need to speak, and so I lift the conversation off his back?” Here, the speaker suggests that he talks excessively out of misplaced altruism, assuming that others dread conversation as much as he dreads silence. However, this self-justification is immediately undercut by a more revealing question: “Do I feel so unworthy that only by cracking my bones and offering my juiciest marrow will I be suffered to stay?” This visceral metaphor—of breaking himself open to provide something of value—exposes the deep-rooted desperation behind his compulsion. His verbosity is not merely a social quirk; it is an act of self-sacrifice, a plea for acceptance.

The poem then takes a psychoanalytic turn as the speaker wonders if his unchecked speech is an externalized manifestation of his “Jungian shadow.” The reference to Jungian psychology suggests that his verbosity may be an unconscious attempt to purge suppressed guilt, anxiety, or fear. He contrasts this with murder—“which hides very well”—implying that some impulses remain buried, while others, like compulsive confession, burst uncontrollably into speech. This moment blurs the line between metaphor and reality: “Is the Imp of the Verbose not a metaphor, but a flesh-and-blood homunculus that controls my jaw, larynx, and tongue?” By framing his affliction as an external force, the speaker both acknowledges his lack of control and satirizes his own melodrama.

The final stanza returns to the absurdity of social interactions. The speaker’s cousin believes her boyfriend will marry her, while the boyfriend confides in the speaker that she is neurotic and that he needs marijuana just to email her. The juxtaposition of her romantic certainty—“She subscribes to Modern Bride, is choosing china, and hums Mendelssohn’s ‘Wedding March’ all day”—with his disillusionment is comically tragic. The speaker, positioned as the unwilling keeper of this secret, is left in an impossible position: “When I see her next, what will I say?” This concluding question serves as the perfect encapsulation of the poem’s dilemma. Will he lie to spare her feelings? Will he blurt out the ugly truth? Or will his Imp of the Verbose take over, unleashing yet another wildly inappropriate monologue? The poem offers no answer, leaving the reader to assume the inevitable.

"Imp of the Verbose" is a sharp, darkly humorous exploration of compulsive speech and the anxieties that drive it. Webb masterfully constructs a speaker who is at once irritating, pitiable, and deeply human. Through relentless exaggeration and self-aware irony, the poem exposes the way language—rather than facilitating connection—can sometimes isolate, unsettle, or betray. Beneath the humor lies a poignant recognition of insecurity: the fear of silence, the fear of insignificance, and the desperate hope that words, even excessive ones, might be enough to justify existence.


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