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Classic and Contemporary Poetry


EPIGRAM (4) by MATTHEW PRIOR

First Line: FRANK CARVES VERY ILL, YET WILL PALM ALL THE MEATS
Last Line: IT COST THEE MORE IN WHIPS THAN HAY.
Subject(s): JOKES; POETRY & POETS; SMOKING; TOBACCO; PIPES; CIGARS; CIGARETTES;

FRANK carves very ill, yet will palm all the meats:
He eats more than six, and drinks more than he eats.
Four pipes after dinner he constantly smokes,
And seasons his whiffs with impertinent jokes.
Yet sighing, he says, we must certainly break;
And my cruel unkindness compels him to speak;
For of late I invite him -- but four times a week.

ANOTHER.

To John I owed great obligation;
But John unhappily thought fit
To publish it to all the nation:
Sure John and I are more than quit.

ANOTHER.

YES, every poet is a fool:
By demonstration Ned can show it;
Happy, could Ned's inverted rule
Prove every fool to be a poet.

ANOTHER.

THY nags (the leanest things alive),
So very hard thou lovest to drive;
I heard thy anxious coachman say,
It cost thee more in whips than hay.



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