AN HONEST tailor, whose baptismal And patronymic appellations Were William Button, had a dismal Tendency to deep potations; And though, as he was over-mated, Like Jerry Sneak, our snip was fated In spite of all his hungry heavings, To drink the tea and coffee leavings, And eat cold mutton-flaps at dinner; Yet sometimes the rebellious sinner, Asserting his marital rights, Would on the wages-paying nights, Betake him to the public-house, To smoke, and tipple, and carouse; And as with each new dram and sip he Still more and more pot-valiant grew, At last he fairly braved his spouse, Called her a vixen and a shrew, A Jezebel and a Xantippe! Returning home one night, our varlet Bold with his wife-compelling liquor, Rattled the knocker quick and quicker, When with fierce eye and face of scarlet His tender spouse appeared, and shrilly Vented reproaches on her Willy. "So, Jackanapes, you've come at last! No doubt the evening has been passed In tippling purl, you drunken sot, Mulled ale and amber, hot and hot; While your poor wife is left to slave, And drink cold water from the can, Cold water, ye remorseless knave!" "Cold!" cried the husband, who began In turn to wrangle and to storm it -- "Cold! ye poor lazy slattern; -- cold! Then why, ye good-for nothing scold, Why don't you warm it?" | Discover our Poem Explanations and Poet Analyses!Other Poems of Interest...A PHONECALL FROM FRANK O'HARA by ANNE WALDMAN SESTINA OF THE TRAMP ROYAL by RUDYARD KIPLING PREPARATORY MEDITATIONS, 2D SERIES: 3 by EDWARD TAYLOR WEST END FAIR by ANNA LETITIA BARBAULD EAST SIDE MOVING PICTURE THEATRE - SUNDAY by MAXWELL BODENHEIM |