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Classic and Contemporary Poetry


A LETTER FROM A FATHER by ANONYMOUS

First Line: MY DEAR DAUGHTER / YOU ASK ME IF YOUR HUSBAND.
Last Line: SINCE THE UPTURN / YOUR AFFECTIONATE FATHER
Subject(s): WAGES; SALARIES;

My Dear Daughter:
You ask me if your husband should stay in his present position at an
"adjusted" salary, but you forgot to tell me what he would do if he didn't. You
and he couldn't very well come here just now. Your brother Sheridan's salary has
just been "reconsidered," so he moved into his old room at home, and brought his
wife.
Your sister, Eloise, telegraphed the next day that Wilfred has just been
offered a new contract that was an insult, so your mother is airing out her
room. Wilfred never could endure insults. Your sister, Frances, whom you will
recall has been a private secretary, wrote last week that if anybody thinks she
is going to drop to the level of a common typist, they are mistaken, so we
expect her any day.
What with those and the younger children, I imagine that as long as Rupert's
salary is merely being "adjusted," he had better stay. An adjustment is nothing
like a reduction. It's hard for me to keep up with the new language of big
business, but as I understand it, an "adjustment" is the equivalent of a raise.
Of course, Rupert wouldn't know that; he has been working only since 1928; he
should ask some old-timer to explain what a raise is.
My own business is coming along fine. It was sold on the courthouse steps
last Friday, but there were no bidders, so the sheriff let me keep it. That
makes the best month I've had since the upturn.
Your affectionate Father.



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